You should memorize each of the below euphemisms so
that when you hear it or it is text to you, you won't make a
"Kanye" statement and become fodder for the tabloids!
SWB...SWIMMING WHILE BLACK
SHWB...SHOPPING WHILE BLACK
EWB...EATING WHILE BLACK
LWB...LOOKING WHILE BLACK
SWB...SNORING WHILE BLACK
NWB...NAPPING WHILE BLACK
WWB...WALKING WHILE BLACK
DWB...DRIVING WHILE BLACK
RWB...RUNNING WHILE BLACK
BWB...BANKING WHILE BLACK
RWB...READING WHILE BLACK
TEWB...TEXTING WHILE BLACK
HWB...HITCHHIKING WHILE BLACK
DAWB...DATING WHILE BLACK
WOWB...WORSHIPPING WHILE BLACK
LWB...LAUGHING WHILE BLACK
BAWB...BAR/B/QUEING WHILE BLACK
SUBWB...SUNBATHING WHILE BLACK
STWB...STUDYING WHILE BLACK
CWB...CELEBRATING WHILE BACK
PWB...PRAYING WHILE BLACK
CRWB...CRYING WHILE BLACK
PRWB...PROTESTING WHILE BLACK
FWB...FIGHTING WHILE BLACK
PSWB...PLAYING SPORTS WHILE BLACK
KWB...KISSING WHILE BLACK
GWB...GARDENING WHILE BLACK
REWB...RENTING WHILE BLACK
LIWB...LIVING WHILE BLACK
MWB...MARRYING WHILE BLACK
POWB...POOR WHILE BLACK
RIWB...RICH WHILE BLACK
DYWB...DYING WHILE BLACK
TRWB...TRAVELING WHILE BLACK
JWB...JAILED WHILE BLACK
IWB...IMAGINING WHILE BLACK
HWB...HOPING WHILE BLACK
TWB...THINKING WHILE BLACK
HWB...HARASSED WHILE BLACK
KWB...KILLED WHILE BLACK
MUWB...MURDERED WHILE BLACK
CWB...CONNED WHILE BLACK
FWB...FRAMED WHILE BLACK
SEWB...SEGREGATED WHILE BLACK
JOWB...JOGGING WHILE BLACK
ECWB...EATING CHICKEN WHILE BLACK
DANWB...DANCING WHILE BLACK
MMWB...MAKING MONEY WHILE BLACK
Make sure that if you are engaged in any of the above
activities or events that you carefully scope out your
surroundings and make sure that if you have been
photographed or videoed on someone's smart phone, that you
clearly yell out one of the above abbreviated statements so
that if you are arrested or tased by either the police or a
white vigilante group that at least your protest was
recorded.
As you can tell from the above listings, there are not
too many things that black folks do can in the age of Trump
that are possibly not life threatening. Seemingly, too many
people and law enforcement officials are anxious and eager
to shut you down, so, a word to the wise, stay alert.
The best advice I can give you? Simple: stay at home
24/7. Keep the blinds drawn. Never go outside except to buy
groceries and even then, do not be uppity and buy top shelf
grocery items because that will bring undue attention to
yourself.
Always talk in a low whisper and avoid eye contact
whenever possible. Wear old clothes and walk slowly because
if you walk fast, that means you are trying to evade the
law.
If asked your opinion on any subject, wait for a moment
and with your head bowed, quietly answer with, "I best leave
those matters to white folks."
If you have a job, stay away from any water cooler
conversations and when work is over, go directly home...no
dawdling!
Like the recent story of the black woman who was a
student at Yale University and had the brashness to take a
nap in the commons area of her dorm but yet when the police
were called on her by a white fellow student, she forgot the
above, NWB, and paid the price for it.
Be smarter! Don't nap in public! You will be found out
and reported!
Contact Lafe Tolliver at tolliver@Juno.com
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