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Etiquette in the 21st Century:
Business Etiquette –Exclusion In The Workplace
By Robin Reeves
Soulcial Scene Contributor
Have you ever been invited to a party where you did not know
anyone except for the person who invited you and the entire
time it seemed as if you were trying to start or jump into a
conversation but no one was really interested in what you
had to say?
Or, have you ever been the new person in a class of seniors
who have been in school together since freshmen year and
have no interest in adding a new person to the group so no
one will acknowledge you with a simple hello or strike up a
small talk conversation?
Are you the employee who gows to work every day and says “I
like my job but the people...?”.
If you said yes to any of these three scenarios or if you
know someone who has experienced these type of situations
then this business etiquette article on exclusion may be
just what the doctor ordered.
I find it quite interesting that over the past few years
several Toledo and surrounding area organizations, clubs and
companies etc...have committed to creating a more inclusive
workplace. Maybe they realize that not only is a more
inclusive workplace needed but it is also required if they
intend to move their agenda forward to reach their goals.
I have thought about this and wondered what happens when an
organization creates a new inclusion policy and procedure to
be implemented by the same staff that saw nothing wrong with
the old exclusion way.
Whether it was written or not, they (the staff) may have
felt a sense of comfort and security with the old policy
that worked just fine for them even though now, for the
sake of the company, a new inclusion policy is needed.
So back to my first paragraph with the scenarios of
exclusion. The party people, college students and coworkers
only found value in what they were comfortable with. To be
receptive of adding a new dynamic policy to the equation may
require too much effort which will move them out of their
comfort zone.
How did we get to the point that exclusion is easier than
inclusion? The point at which exclusion creates a safe
place and makes people feel superior because of position -
power of privilege?
Well if you are reading this article and are interested in
how to avoid getting stuck in the exclusion zone with false
securities, I have a few questions for you to ask yourself
to determine if your actions could be creating an exclusive
workplace environment.
When answering these questions, keep in mind that proper
etiquette and image is the art of sincerely making people
around you feel comfortable with you and the ability to
create a distraction-free environment.
Also, your answers to these questions are based on your
characteristics and personality because your answers are
based on what is correct to you. So in other words, there is
no “correct” answer because your response may be driven by
internal conflicts, motives, needs and perceptual press.
This type of questioning is a form of ambiguous stimuli.
Five questions to
ask yourself if you are an excluder at work.
1.
Am I a professional bully?
2.
What do I have to gain from excluding my co-workers?
3.
Have your behavior negatively affected productivity for my
organization?
4.
Am I creating a hostile work environment?
5.
Am I following and agree with the new inclusion policy and
procedures guidelines?
Five questions to
ask yourself if you have excluded yourself at work:
1.
Am I a good fit for this organization?
2.
Have I put up any barriers that created my feeling of
exclusion?
3.
Can I be productive while feeling excluded?
4.
Has my confidence and self esteem been effected because I
feel excluded?
5.
Am I aware of the companies inclusion policy and procedures
and how they apply to me?
If you have answered the questions above to the best of your
ability, you are one step closer to success! In my business
etiquette class we discuss how identifying the types of
relationships you have created and how you can break the
barriers of exclusion. Building your confidence, personal
integrity and respect will give you a solid foundation to
begin the process of moving forward in business and to how
the false security of position, power and privilege will not
be your only measure of success.
Please visit our website at
www.reevesetiquette.com
for our 2016 Business Etiquette Workshop in April!
In closing, here is an insert of a passage from the book
A Choice of Weapons by Gordon Parks
“I realized, for the first time, that my fears had been
generously fed by my own insecurity, that there was far more
selfishness in my heart than I could comfortably live with.
I found that praise had come much easier to my ear than
criticism; and , having grabbed hold of the essence of my
problems, I saw that I hadn’t matured so much as I had just
grown older. It would take time to overcome these faults;
but at least I was aware of them.” pg. 238
“Because Manners Matter”
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