Now, you can avoid those irritating
pleas from the pulpit about giving to the neighbor next door
who lost his house to a fire and you can now block out pleas
to give to orphans and widows in Togo or Gambia or Syria.
Now, you can avoid eye contact with your
fellow pew sitter when passing the offering basket and
simply use your favorite app and give by yourself in
blissful solitude.
Ahh...how good is this new technology!
Or...is it?
Come to think of it and with so many pastors
seemingly rah-rahing the goodies of technology, let’s
consider some more conveniences that we can allow technology
to serve us and make our lives more comfortable and have
fewer contacts with people.
How about the following for the church folks
to emulate?
One:
Now that we
can outsource our giving to an app on a smart phone, let's
do the following with the sermon. After all, it’s just a man
or a woman standing up for about 20 to 30 minutes and
preaching or teaching the Word of God.
Surely, we can wait for the CD or do a
live feed at a different time other than on Sundays and
still get the same message! Record it and move on! Matter of
fact, I would rather sit by myself and hear it for myself
without a lot of amening! or shouting served alongside the
message.
I mean, do I really have to subject
myself to Brother Calvin jumping up next to me and shouting
an Amen! Using technology, I can fast forward past Bro
Calvin and his emotional displays and focus on the Word.
Ok...so I may miss why Bro Calvin shouted out as to his
daughter being healed of pancreatic cancer, but I can wait
for the rerun for that testimony.
Speaking of testimonies, with the church
service being recorded, I can bypass people coming forward
to the altar and confessing sins and such stuff and I can
avoid families joining the church. I will see them some
other time...just not now.
Two: With this new technology in
the church, I can swoop in with my camera and pick up the
choir and replay the songs that I want to hear. No more
being captive to a slow moving Amazing Grace or a even
slower, Jesus Keep Me Near the Cross. With a few taps on my
phone connected to my TV, I can edit the service to what I
want to see and hear. Isn't technology great!
Three:
No offense,
but I can ditch the pastoral prayer and opening welcome from
the lay leader and deacons. Prayers are a dime a dozen and
Deacon Bennett simply does not move me with his long
southern drawl about welcome to Third Flame Missionary
Baptist Church. Been there...done that.
Four:
Announcements and welcoming of guests. Are you serious? Go
to the church website and the announcements about the youth
outings and senior citizens meetings and free food
distributions and the clothing drive and the church picnic
are all there.
Why waste my Sunday time about something that
I can read later?
Welcoming of guests? It's recorded. I will
check them out later when I get back from my Sunday golf
outing or the sumptuous all you can eat buffet at Sandy's
Place.
Five:
Benediction?
That means the service is over, doesn't' it? If so, I am
outta here and I will catch the closing prayer when I see
the video. Handshakes and hugs from the other pew sitters?
Yeah, it’s OK but it is the same people and I do make it
back to the church about once every other month and I can
shake their hands then. No loss.
Remember, you critics, I am coming
together as the Body of Christ. It is just that I am doing
it a little differently. I am using the wonder of
technology. Nothing wrong with that is it? No harm there, is
it?
Six:
Look at it
this way. If everyone was like me, think of the huge savings
there would be if everyone did what I am doing. No need for
huge overhead expenses like mortgage payments, heating
bills, paving of parking lots, water bills, minimal phone
bills, low janitorial bills (nothing to clean because no one
is at the church to get it dirty!), lower insurance costs,
huge savings on the printing of bulletins and messages and
stuff like that (hug a tree...save the forests!).
And you know what is best of all? No
one constantly bugging you about how things are or what are
you doing or how is your walk with the Lord or how is your
auntie Helen doing or are you coming to the men's breakfast
or people asking you to pray for them or can you help out
with the Easter program or the kid's church. None of that
touchy-feely stuff. What a relief.
Man, this technology stuff is fab and I
am glad that it has finally invaded the church.
It is about time that the church catch up and
get hip and move with it.
Now, we can do our own thing and not have
someone looking over your shoulder about what are you doing
for the Lord or about sin in your life. None of your
business!
That is why this techno stuff is super
cool! Just me and my smart phone and a TV.
Contact Lafe Tolliver, Attorney at
Tolliver@Juno.com |